Recently I was given the opportunity to share my biracial experience on a dear friend’s (@seekinggoodvibes) blog. At this point, I feel like I’ve written about it so many times. Yes, I was honest in those blog pieces, but the piece I wrote for Kenny was by far the most vulnerable I have ever been.
I think a lot of it comes with maturing and processing things differently than I did a few years ago, but at the same time, some of the things I wrote surprised myself. At times, a simple sentence I wrote would make me cry:
“There is this feeling of simultaneously belonging to two groups, but also belonging nowhere and to no one”
That sentence encompassed how I’ve felt my whole life…I was finally able to put to words the indescribable feeling I’d tried to express for so long. It was liberating, and terrifying.
(Via my Instagram post caption @jaclynlee97)
“My [blog] piece brought up some painful memories, but it was such a growing experience.
I tend to hold in all my thoughts about what I’ve gone through. I fear what other people will think if I share what I truly think (or share stories of what I’ve gone through as a biracial woman) because I don’t want them to hurt for me or place guilt on themselves.
I don’t have all of my thoughts together, but I’m realizing that I need to open up. Writing is healing. And I can’t let my fear of other peoples’ opinions, or fear of my true feelings, hold me back anymore. I will continue to struggle, but it is a process. God extends His grace to me through it all, and He has comforted me in my hardest moments.
Even if only one person can connect with my piece, I’m content. Thank you, Kenny, for giving me a platform to share my story. And thank you to all my friends & family who have always supported me.”
Photo Credit: Ariana Madison (@ariana_madison)